Tag Archives: back to school

Bullying … A Revisit

Well I’m almost 2 weeks into the Summer Blogging Challenge, and I’m about to be a cheater. I’ve been in celebratory mode all day, and haven’t had a spare moment to do anything but nap and relax in the peace and quiet. ūüėȬ† In other words, I didn’t write anything new today.

But, I’ve got a plan. Instead, I’m going to share one of my favourite blog posts from the past. One that I think it’s incredibly appropriate for this time of the year. One that will hopefully make a difference in the lives of the little’s around you.

Forgive me for my laziness but please read these words that I had to say …..

Bullying. Sucks. A lot. Having been the fat kid growing up, I suffered¬†through my share of it. Not from my peers¬†so much, but from older kids and people in the world around me. Society as a whole can be really hard on¬† people who¬†are different. Different in any way, shape or form. Body shape, skin color, height, weight, age, sex, glasses, crooked teeth, freckles, etc, etc. It’s a never-ending¬†list of stupid being¬†perpetuated by people who have ZERO confidence in themselves. I survived it, but it hurt. A lot.

Having said all that, I’ve also been the parent of bullies, on a few¬†different occasions. (Remember ~¬†I’m a foster parent). I’ve seen the world through their eyes and their outlook is just as grim as the persons being tormented. These kids believe that they’re worthless and stupid and ugly and horrible and that no one likes them. They feel abandoned by their parents, their friends and the world as a whole. They are lonely in a way that not many of us can understand. They feel powerless in their personal lives and bullying gives them POWER. They are controlling the situation instead of the situation controlling them. Bullying is almost NEVER about the victim, it’s about the Instigator. Almost Always.

It’s sad and maddening, but bullying is never going away. No matter how many posters we hang up, or how many commercials get shown on TV, bullying is here to stay. Think about how many “bullies” you know right now in your own group of friends. We all know someone who¬†will push and push until they get their way. We’ve all got a friend that thinks it’s funny to pick on you or your other friends, and then justifies it with a “just kidding”, or “you know I love you”. I can guarantee we’ve all had bosses that took their position of power to an unreasonable level while we just had to stand there and take it. Are those not all instances of bullying? Adults do it ALL the time … we just use bigger, fancier¬†words.

I think that it is worth educating kids on how to handle a bully. How to safely tell on them, how to avoid certain situations, and how to walk away. Kids need to feel safe at school and in their community. But there’s other ways to educate our kids and teach them to be better, in spite of the bullying going on around them.

Number One. Teach children their worth. If you’re a parent, make sure your children know how fabulous they are. Teach them about strength and confidence and grace. If you’re a teacher, pay attention to the kids that come from bad situations. Be their positive influence. Build your kids up so they find value inside of themselves as opposed to searching for it in the world around them. In my experience, my little “bullies” have had almost no self-esteem and were just desperate to have someone, anyone pay attention to them. No one made them feel good about themselves, so they set out to make other people look worse than they felt. Empower your children. They need your strength, until they feel it themselves.

Number Two. Teach children to not be followers. This seems like a pretty obvious statement, but how many of us really teach it? We teach our kids that there is strength in numbers and that they’re safer in groups. We should be teaching them how to be leaders … good, strong, positive leaders. Bully’s are not all that scary when they’re standing there on their own. Teach children to leave jerks and morons standing there by themselves and walk away. Teach them that it’s not rude to walk away when their friends are being mean or fighting. They don’t need to always have their buddy’s “back”. We spend so much time teaching kids to be polite and not enough time teaching them to be their own person. Give your children excuses for getting out of uncomfortable situations … “my Mom will take away my phone if I stay here”, “If I say that, my Dad will take away hockey”. Something, anything, but give them your words, until they have their own.

Number Three. Teach children that they have a voice.¬†Kids need to understand the power that their words carry, especially positive ones. Teach them that it’s okay to tell people what they’re doing is wrong. That it’s okay to say No, and to stand up for someone else. Teach them how to tell someone when they see bullying occur. Teach them that a smile and a Hello can make a difference in someone’s life. Encourage them to speak up and not be quiet.

Number Four. Teach children that they don’t have to be friends with everyone.¬†A lot¬†of times bullying starts because kids are different from¬†the majority of their peers. Everyone is NOT going to be friends, and that’s okay. The world is a big place and there is a match out there for everyone. Kids need to know that. A lot of times,¬†they think we want them to¬†hang out with the “weirdos”, so they fight against doing the “right” thing.¬†¬†I always tell my kids that they don’t have to be friends with everyone, but that doesn’t mean they get to be mean to anyone. Ever.

Number Five. Be an example. Do not laugh at the fat person that walks by. Don’t point out someones dirty, awful clothes. Don’t call people ugly, stupid, crazy. Don’t laugh when your children tell you an inappropriate story. They are watching you. They are copying you. Show them the proper way to behave. If you aren’t guarding your words and actions, why in the world will your children?

Finally as parents and adults, OPEN YOUR EYES.

Do not assume that your little “angel” is behaving appropriately at school. If someone tells you that your child has been misbehaving, don’t brush it off, look into it. Talk openly about bullying and the different forms it takes. Be present in their lives.

Watch for changes in your children. Are they pulling away from you, are talkers suddenly quiet, are social butterfly’s now¬†hiding in their bedrooms? Have they stopped eating or are they grossly overeating all of a sudden? Something is wrong. Get them help.

Bullying is about Power. I’m giving my kids the power, so bullying has NO POWER over them.¬†How about you?

 

This post is part of the 30 Day Blogging Challenge. Click on the links below to check out some of the other awesome bloggers involved in the challenge. So much awesome.

Liam ~ Natasha ~ Zita ~ MagzD ~ Peter ~ Christine ~ Cliff ~ Hethr ~ Tracy

Looks like we made it.

Twas’ the night before school and all through the house, not a child was stirring –¬†because I’ve sent them all to bed. HALLELUJAH … my routine is back in full swing.

Tomorrow the Wiener 5 head on back to their happy place. Grades One, Four, Eight, Nine and Twelve are calling their names and beckoning them with promises of friends, hot lunches and homework.

Only two get recess which really upsets the 3, but when I point out that they no longer need to change into indoor shoes, they cheer right up. 2 kids will have “graduations” this year, one of whom will have to wear a dress. The last time she wore one, she was 2.5 and very angry about it.¬†2 are having to ride the school bus this year which is something that they have never done before. 3 have lunch kits and 2 refuse to take anything but paper bags. 3 will wake up with time to spare, 1 will have the morning planned out by the minute and 1 will have to be forced awake and out of the house. 5 will complain when I make them take the annual back to school photo, and then make me promise to not post it on Facebook.

Tomorrow, I will get to work in my office without being summoned to stop a fight. I won’t hear my name screamed an average of 89 times/day. I will be able to get my errands done without being begged to stop at 7-11 for slurpees. If I feel like going out for a coffee with friends, BY MYSELF, I can. I could also have a nap. Hhhmmm .. maybe I’ll¬†just have a nap. An all day, my house is quiet, no one is bothering me kind of nap. Tomorrow,¬†freedom will reign.

Have an awesome year kids. Hope you get the teachers you want, and have at least 2 of your best friends in your class. I hope you don’t have to bring home homework on your first day. I hope everyone loves the $100 jeans that you HAD to have. I hope that you don’t miss the bus as the walk is long. I hope that this is your best year yet and that your successes far outweigh your failures. I pray that no ignorant words spoken over you will stick. I hope that you will hear my voice when you’re presented with opportunities that you know are wrong. I hope that you will guard your heart and mind and focus on what’s truly important. I hope you know just how amazing you truly are.

Always remember that Mommy loves you. But please, get out of my house.

asylum

This post is part of the 30 Day Blogging Challenge. Click on the links below to check out some of the other awesome bloggers involved in the challenge. So much awesome.

Liam ~ Natasha ~ Zita ~ MagzD ~ Peter ~ Christine ~ Cliff ~ Hethr ~ Tracy

Teachers, Tuesdays and Thankfulness

I’m fairly confident that we’re not all going to make to Tuesday based solely on this day alone.

I’ve been called names, spit at, kicked at and shoved out of the way. I’ve been hugged, cuddled, praised and given beautiful drawings. It is just one massive mess of boredom, excitement and loose ends around here.

We are officially “a¬†mess” and WE are all very much ready for school to start.

I may tease about wanting to get rid of my kids and getting them out of my hair, but in all honesty, they’re more excited about going back to class than I am. (Barely, but they are).

They’re ready to see their friends, show off their new clothes and their pretty pink hair. There are girls to be chased and a final year of high school to be tackled. A new bus route and new friends. Volleyball, Basketball and¬†Phys. Ed.¬†It is time.

I’ve prepared them¬†for the new year, and they are pretty much¬†ready to be handed over to their teachers. But before I do that, I’ve got a few things to say.

First I must apologize for not getting every single thing on their school supply lists.¬†I’m pretty sure some of those items are not even real, but anyways.¬†¬†The soles of their runners are white though, so hopefully that’ll give me some bonus points. We labelled everything including ALL of their markers, shoes, bags, lunch kits and the 300 duo tangs. I promise to send no peanut butter anything, but I make no guarantee’s that their lunches will be healthy, all the time. They will usually be clean, and may or may not have socks on. But they will be there every morning awake, fed and ready for the day.

Secondly, I want to thank you. Thank-you for being their guide when I’m not there. Thank-you for keeping them alive. Thank-you for teaching them the things that I have no patience to even attempt. Thank-you for recognizing their positives when sometimes it’s easier to focus on negatives. Thank-you for taking the time to change these little lives every day. Thank-you for giving me 8 hours of peace and quiet daily.

I truly couldn’t do what I do, without you. You are loved and appreciated more than you’ll ever know. Please, never forget that, especially when I forget to send in all of their permission slips and school fees on time.¬† ūüôā

Here’s to another awesome year. C’mon Tuesday.

hugteacher

This post is part of the 30 Day Blogging Challenge. If you want to follow along with all of us “challengers”, click on their links below.¬†

Liam ~ Natasha ~ Zita ~ MagzD ~ Peter ~ Christine ~ Cliff ~ Hethr ~ Tracy

12 More Sleeps

Summer is such a lovely time.

Sunshine, rainbows and children filled with¬†joyfulness¬†and glee. Mother’s bonding with their children and enjoying all of the freedom that no school brings. Playdates with friends and trips camping at the lake. Making¬†s’mores at the campfire and running through the sprinkler. Perfect, family awesomeness.

It sounds heavenly doesn’t it? And thankfully, that is exactly what my summer was like. Exactly.

Minutes turned into hours – hours into days – days into weeks and two months later, I’ve had all of the joy that one Mother could ever handle. My family happiness meter is filled to the top, and I’m ready to share my little bundles of joy with others. I’m willing to let them go so they can bless others.

Over the summer, their “skill” levels increased dramatically. They can now “sing” at the tops of their lungs for hours at a time. Perfect for music class. They can run for hours and hours, without seemingly needing a break and just might be your next track stars in the making. They’re also ready for walks in the wilderness as they figured out how to leave little trails of stuff wherever they go. I can rest easily knowing that you won’t lose them in the woods. They’ve also learned a lot about things being fair, and have reminded me on numerous occasions just how much they appreciate my teaching them all about that. And most importantly, they’ve had many “sharing sessions” over the past two months, and have “bonded” over toys and team building. It’s been quite inspirational actually. And now they’re ready to share their skills with you.

You’re welcome world. The Wiener Five are ready for school, and hopefully you’re ready for them cause ready or not, they’re coming. 12 more sleeps.

Enjoy them, I most certainly have.

backtoschool

This is Day Two of the 30 Day Blogging Challenge. If you want to do some awesome reading … follow along with all of us “challengers”.

Liam ~ Natasha ~ Zita ~ MagzD ~ Peter ~ Christine ~ Cliff ~ Hethr ~ Tracy

S is for September

September. It truly is the most wonderful time of the year, and I for one, cannot wait for its arrival.

And before you all think I’m mean and don’t like my kids, shush. I love my children very much, and just¬†as they love me more when I buy them nice presents, I love them more when they’re in school. I will admit, when they were younger it was harder to send them off to school. Now¬† …. not so much.

Frankly, they like it too. They love being with their friends all day, playing on school sports teams and not having a long list of chores. They also miss the routine that I am so desperately craving. There’s something secure and comforting about knowing exactly what you need to be doing at any given time. When they’re busy, they’re not in trouble. I like busy children.

September is also my January. My “new year” always begins on September 1st as¬†my life¬†revolves around the children anyways. It’s a great time to start new things. Going on a diet, heading to the gym and¬†getting your house in order are¬†all perfect September activities. We ‘re already helping our kids be successful and teaching them to start their year off on a good foot, why not do the same for ourselves?

January is just the half-way point of the year¬†and it’s the time we have to send more pencils, erasers and kleenex to school. It’s not a good time for changing anything, especially since you’re too fat from Christmas anyways. If you start changes in September … they’re a lot easier to stick to come to December. That’s my theory anyways.

The arrival of September means that Fall is soon on it’s way and that the hot weather is over. I don’t like being hot. At all. I love Fall, changing leaves, cooler temps,¬† jeans and sweatshirts and cooking in a crockpot. It also means new socks for everyone as August 30th is the bi-annual “throwing away of the lonely and ugly socks” day.¬†¬†Good-bye to the stinky, holey and un-matched socks … hello to new white clean ones.

It also means it’s time for my shoppping pilgrimmage to Target, Kohls, TJ Maxx, Big Lots¬†and Ross. I get to eat biscuits and gravy for breakfast and go to Old Country Buffet for lunch. (Not exactly sure how I’m going to make those 2 experiences gluten-free, but I sure am going to try). I will fill my motorhome with $2 boxes of cereal, shoes and whatever else calls my name at The Dollar Tree. It really is a blessed event, and one of the best weeks in Fall.

So .. as September draws closer, please know that I won’t be crying at the door as my children head off to the bus. I will be shoving them out the door with their new backpacks and $100 calculators and waving good-bye. As soon as I’m done singing and rejoicing, I’ll probably have a little nap and then celebrate the start of the new year.

Aaaaah. September.

This post is Day 21 of the Summer Blog Challenge – 31 posts in 31 Days

Please visit my fellow challenge bloggers and read their stories.

Meaghan at Magz D Life
Tam at Tam I Am
Liam at In The Now
Jessica at2plus2X2