Tag Archives: social media

Who are you anyways?

I am a TOTAL fan of Social Media. Huge fan. Big honking fan actually and there is a distinct possibility that I have a small addiction. Just a slight one though as I could quit it anytime I wanted.¬† ūüôā¬† But anyways …..

I’ve made some amazing connections and “met” some really cool people. Many of them are exactly who they claim to be. They are¬†people with real concerns and really great ideas. They are funny. They are caring and they are a supportive ear. I like those kind of people. A lot.

And then there are the other ones. People that claim to be one thing, but in reality are absolutely nothing like that. Nothing. They jump up to reprimand and correct people and how they’re doing things, while they do the exact same things at home. They sometimes act sweet and innocent, and then you later learn that they’ve been kicked out of every playgroup in the city. Or you’ve been having a nice conversation with them on Twitter and then you log into Facebook and meet their alter ego, Crazy Face. It’s all so very interesting and more than a little bit frustrating.

I know how quickly things can get carried away when you’re not face to face with someone. It’s so easy to get caught up in the anonymity that the internet gives us and just speak without thinking. Our walls all come down and we find a voice that we didn’t even know we had.¬† Unfortunately,¬†common sense quite often¬†gets lost behind that voice and¬†nuttiness seems to come flying out of our mouths. There’s also that¬†whole “feelings get lost in the translation” thing that doesn’t always help our stories out. And no matter how many smiley face emoticons we add to try and make our point, our true intention doesn’t always come across.

This isn’t just a Social Media phenomenon, we see it all over the place. People calling themselves one thing and then “living” something completely different. People that are put into a “role” in their lives¬†either¬†in their workplace or their community. And instead of doing what they should be, they end up using their position for something completely different. ¬†I really don’t care who you are or what you claim to be, but please “BE” what you’re claiming.

If you’re going to be the mayor of your community, be the best stinking mayor that you can be. Stand up and fight for your constituents. Be an example of what a true leader can be. Don’t wear that title as a crown of popularity and ignore the little people. Don’t pretend to be a mayor … be the leader you were elected to be.

If you’re going to call yourself a breastfeeding advocate, by all means, pull out all the stops and do your community proud. But don’t spend time tearing non-breastfeeders down. Be an example and let them see the beauty of it, and not just a militant ‘knows I’m right” person.

If you’re a teacher, recognize your role in the lives of the children you’ve been given to teach. Remember that they are watching you and waiting for your guidance. The words you use, and the actions you portray will leave lasting marks on their lives. Help them to fall in love with learning, and ensure they leave you in a better place than when they arrived at the beginning of the school year.

If you’re a Mom, just be a Mom. You don’t need to be perfect, you just need to love your babies and be the best you that you can be. Don’t pretend to have it all together when inside you’re falling apart. Be real and honest about what’s going on in your world. The sooner you can do that, the sooner you’ll find real help and support and feel “normal”.

I’m sure that my words right now may be coming across as judgy¬†or harsh, and that so isn’t my intention. I’m not coming from a place of judgement but from a place of wanting people to just be true to themselves. We spend so much time pretending to be something we aren’t just to impress others. In doing that, we devalue ourselves and all that we have to offer.

Why choose to be a second rate version of someone else, when you could be the best YOU that you could be?

drsuess

This post is part of the 30 Day Blogging Challenge. If you want to follow along with all of us “challengers”, click on their links below.¬† Please go and give them a read … writing every day for 30 days is TOUGH to do.

Liam ~ Natasha ~ Zita ~ MagzD ~ Peter ~ Christine ~ Cliff ~ Hethr ~ Tracy

Bravery via Keyboard

I’m not exactly sure how many more times I can watch my friends and fellow business owners get ripped apart via Social Media,¬†without deleting everyone and moving into a bubble, so instead I’m writing this.

And now I take a deep breath and go ….

I cannot believe how many people with justified complaints and concerns¬†think that those things¬†give them the right to become abusive and downright ignorant. Yes, you’ve been wronged or don’t understand why a decision was made, and that’s okay.¬†And yes, you’ve got every right to ask about it and ask for clarification.¬†

In theory, many of these¬†“situations”¬†will turn out to just be a misunderstanding but quite often, rules or pricing or ideas were put in place for a reason. They aren’t going to change because you’re screaming at the top of your lungs or throwing ignorant comments around like confetti. And maybe, just maybe, you could be wrong. Get a grip people, life isn’t always fair. Plain and simple.

So if you’re one of those people¬†that is using Facebook, Twitter, Yelp or even¬†Google¬†as a disguise to say WHATEVER you want, get over yourself. Hiding behind a computer screen and using a keyboard as a weapon is so not okay. Stop doing it.

When you’re sitting there all riled up, angry and ready to start spewing out nasty words, think. Would you be brave enough to say this to the persons face? If not, why are you saying it?

If you feel that it’s a great place to address concerns with a business, think again. If you’ve got serious issues with something or someone, email them or call them. Making hateful posts and comments are so not fair and in all honesty, very childish.

It’s very hard to get your point across in words and it’s so easy to take things out of context. Your simple complaint can spin wildly out of control, and cause huge problems for someone who made an innocent mistake.

We have bad days, we make mistakes. We say things out of anger or out of sheer desperation. We scream when we want to cry. We walk away when we need to apologize. We ALL do it. Pause a second, take a breath and give people the opportunity to apologize and/or rectify the situation. 

Make a choice to do the right thing, and for pete’s sake, send an email or give a phone call as opposed to spewing your hatred all over Social Media. Odds are good that you’re not going to end up accomplishing what you set out to do. Your “enemy” will appear justified and you will look like a fool. Stand up for yourself, but do that like an adult and not a pubescent teenager.

None of us are perfect …. quit acting like you are. This isn’t about judgement, this is about common sense. Be good to each other. Please.

rudeness

Save the Drama for your Mama.

Drama. It’s everywhere, it’s annoying and it doesn’t seem to be going away. Facebook and Twitter seem to be a breeding ground for stupid, and I am constantly shocked by all of the things I read on a daily basis. It really is sickening and wrong, and frankly, pathetic.

I’ve spent the last couple of weeks watching friends and acquaintances get attacked and wrung through¬†the ringer. I’ve seen people be disgustingly abusive and ignorant. I’ve seen incredibly intelligent people get caught up in other people’s “attention seeking” displays of crazy. I’ve deleted really inappropriate and¬†graphic pictures on my page and my childrens.¬†¬† I’ve also just had to unfriended a handful of really mean & ignorant “friends”.¬† I’ve said nothing.

Until now.

If you go on Facebook and say, “I need advice”, don’t expect anything less than that. Don’t freak out when people say something that you don’t agree with or don’t understand. Listen and do whatever you want with it. Just don’t get all crazy, especially since you ASKED FOR IT. Opinions are exactly that, opinions. We don’t all need to agree.

If¬†you post something completely inappropriate or ignorant or abusive or nasty, and you get called out on it, shut-up. Odds are good, you wrote that to get a reaction, so if it doesn’t go the way you think it should, suck it up. You said it, now deal with it.

If you constantly find yourself caught up in situations with people who¬†are always saying, “I hate drama”, odds are really good that they are quite often the start of said drama. Also, be aware that you will at some point get completely and totally caught up in their craziness. Don’t like drama, stay away from the people who are constantly stirring the pot. If your “friends” are starting sentences with “I don’t mean to be rude”, or “no offense”, look for new friends.

If you wake up one morning and find that you’re mad at the world, or your husband or your best friend, please remember that your Facebook status is forever. The words that you post in that small space can destroy your life or theirs. Is it really worth it?

If you insist on making young children and teenagers your “friends”, PLEASE limit what they can see on your page. I really don’t think young people need to see their teachers, leaders or parents best friends in compromising situations. There is nothing like having to explain to your 12-year-old that their teacher must just be wearing a skin coloured shirt, and that she isn’t in fact naked. Use your head people.

If you have an opinion on something and it is solely based on emotion and or ignorance, you are going to be called out by others. Keep that in mind before you bare your soul on any social media platform. If you feel that the best way to get your point across is to use disgusting words or terms, give your head a shake. You have a right to your own opinion but you do not have the right to be abusive and ignorant to make your point. Ever. Do not mistake the anonymity of social media as a disguise for bullying or abuse. GROW UP.

On the flip-side:

If someone says something to bait you and get a response. Ignore them. Let them sit there looking like a fool and just leave it alone. Sometimes, it really is better to just turn the other cheek and be the bigger person. There is no shame in just walking away and saying nothing. The crazies are never going away, they just aren’t. But please, do yourself a favour and don’t engage. I’m not saying that you don’t respond, but when you do, speak with purpose. Normal, healthy debate is an awesome thing. Adding fuel to an already raging fire of stupidity¬†is something totally different.

There is so much power in words, but words ONLY have power if we give power to them. If someone is constantly calling you a loser or stupid, who cares? Those words will hurt but you must choose to ignore their nonsense and keep the power for yourself. No one else can determine your worth. That is in your hands.

So from one adult to another … please be exactly that. An adult. Guard your words. Bite your tongue. And sometimes, just shush it and walk away.